February 2012
2010: You're only cool if you have silly bandz.
2011: Planking is boss.
2012: HEY! Let's all choke on cinnamon.
Man, don't you just love it when people spread...
My mother and I were changing the words to Adele's...
Mom: Kristie, what soda do you want, Pepsi?
Me: Yeah... Wait. NEVER MIND I WANT SOME MOUNTAIINN DEWWW.
*few minutes later*
Me: Ma, which vegetable do you want?
Mom: I WANT NOTHING BUT THE BEST BROCCOLI TOOOOOOO.
*few minutes later*
Mom: Hey, get out the list.
Me: why... So we DON'T FORGET MEAT, I BEG
Mom: I'LL REMEMBER CAUSE YOU SAID
Me: SOMETIMES WE GROCERY SHOP AND SOMETIMES WE EAT OUT INSTEAD
Mom: *pretends to sob*
“You and I have history,
Or don’t you remember?
Sure, she’s got it...”
– “Rumour Has It” by Adele
takeoffyourpantsandjagket:
why can’t jalex count to 70?
cause 69 sure is a mouthful
Cum on people, sex jokes are not funny
Everyone: Are you okay
Everyone: You look tired
Everyone: You look upset
Everyone: You look confused
Everyone: Are you mad at me
Everyone: What are you mad at
Me: IT'S MY FACE
